Muze of the week

I have found it of enormous value when I can permit myself to understand the other person. Our first reaction to most of the statements (which we hear from other people) is an evaluation or judgment, rather than an understanding of it. When someone expresses some feeling, attitude or belief, our tendency is almost immediately to feel "that's right," or "that's stupid," "that's abnormal," "that's unreasonable," "that's incorrect," "that's not nice." Very rarely do we permit ourselves to understand precisely what the meaning of the statement is to the other person.

Adapted from Carl R. Rogers, On becoming a Person (Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1961), pp. 18ff